I felt it was the perfect time to blend two of my long-term series obsessions.
The following is what i submitted as my homework:
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Addreamy of Slytherin, signing up for Herbology and handing in my homework.
Recently, I came across a manuscript of a little-known legend pertaining to Hogwarts Lake. I cannot vouch for its veracity; I simply report here what was written there. I will say that the handwriting was rather spidery. What this might mean, I could not say. I apologize for its length, but I thought it best to reproduce it exactly:
Merchieftainess Mercus swished her tail agitatedly. “I cannot tell you, Professor Dumbledore, how important it is to remove that…..thing from the cave. Several times now, it has attempted to harpoon one of my people with its fire of light and we cannot get close enough to tend our crops properly. It is scaring the farmers to death!”
“I understand,” Dumbledore said gravely. “Has it actually hurt anyone yet?”
“No, but its mere presence is disturbing us all. I feel strongly that this sort of magic simply cannot be tolerated. Please remove it at once!” replied Mercus.
“Certainly, Merchieftainess. I will see what I can do.” And with that, Dumbledore swam off toward the deepest underground cave in the lake. If he had calculated right, he should have just enough time to surface in the air pocket before the gillyweed wore off.
Five minutes later, Dumbledore hauled himself out of the water onto a slab of well-worn rock. He quietly coughed twice as the gills on his neck receded. A quick flick of his wand produced a very soft, shielded glow – just enough to allow him to see without giving his own position away. Sure enough, he caught a glimpse of something metallic at the far end of the cavern.
Without leaving his shielded position on the slab, Dumbledore called out cheerfully, “Hello there! I must compliment you on your choice of accommodations. Quite a nice place for a retreat. However, as headmaster, I am duty-bound to welcome all visitors to Hogwarts. Don’t be shy. Come, introduce yourself!”
A whirring sound ensued, and an extremely large, ornate salt shaker glided toward him. It had odd knobbly bits on the lower half of its body, two tubes which passed for arms of a sort, and a rather stalky-looking piece on top, which swiveled around, searching for the source of the voice.
“Explain,” it said in a high-pitched, tinny voice with no inflection whatsoever.
Taking a chance, Dumbledore stood up. “I believe introductions are in order. My name is Albus Dumbledore, headmaster of Hogwarts School, the grounds….well, undergrounds…..of which we are currently inhabiting. And you are….?” he asked.
The stalky stem appeared to scan Dumbledore up and down. “You are human,” it intoned. “You are interfering with Dalek preparations. You will be exterminated.” With that, it raised one of its appendages and pointed it straight at the headmaster.
Dumbledore flicked his wand a second time. His shield spell snapped into place just as a bolt of energy shot from the Dalek. Suddenly, the energy beam faltered, then flickered out.
“So sorry, murmured Dumbledore. “Did I neglect to mention that the magic here at Hogwarts interferes dreadfully with electronic and energy devices? I expect you are having trouble moving around, too. How careless of me to have forgotten that detail. I do hope this does not inconvenience you terribly. However, I must insist that you retreat farther back in the cavern to engage in your meditation; you are currently scaring the merpeople.”
Dispatching the Dalek into an isolated corner of the cavern, Dumbledore secured it in place and then studied the Dalek gravely. “I would hate to have you suffer unduly at our expense,” he said. “I do believe this situation calls for a Doctor. But………which doctor? Or….should I say, Doctor Who?”
Smiling slightly, Dumbledore pulled out a fresh handful of gillyweed from his robes and began chewing.
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